Saturday, December 5, 2015

No Share


No breakfast. I've lost that meal. Lunch with Alexis then work. I'm working every day now, at Alexis' home studio—an open plan, warm, relaxed space with dogs. I didn't know I'd be working this job when I started MyShare. I've not been considering these pre-work, late breakfasts real shares since they weren't intended as shares, but are shares, shared out of necessity. Is this necessarily harmful thinking? Probably. It is the last day in November. MyShare goes on.

I brought a baguette from Le Fournil and sandwich meats and cheeses. Alexis doesn't eat bread. She didn't share what I offered. She has her own routine. She ate an egg and steamed greens. I left the piece of coconut cake she gave me yesterday in the car. It was gifted to me by her mother, who was already on a plane to California when I received it. I had no one to eat it with. It was cold and damp. I was going to a cold, dark, uncomfortable house. A cluttered space with stains on the carpet. I slept in my sleeping bag and woke and left.

No dinner again. Looking for calories in a hot chocolate. The milk in the frig is outdated and nearly turned. I must get more. Please cow. It was a last leg cocoa, though warm and warming. Then a jasmine tea. Then bed.

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